EMILY ROSE'S PAGE

At home and at church, I was taught that God was good, and I was not; that He deserved all my obedience - all my heart, and yet I was always doing things my own way; that this rebellion was awful, and the only fair result would be banishment from Him forever; and yet God so loved me, that He sent His own sinless Son to take my punishment instead. I learned that this Son had suffered and died for me, then come back to life and gone home to God, so that I could go there, too. But I had to believe all this, hate my sin, accept His death as the only adequate payment for my rebellion, past and future - then make the choice to live life His way from then on. I had to ask Him, they said, to come into my heart.

When I was still fairly little (I think about five), I remember hearing Mom explaining this good news to someone else, and praying silently, "God, if I've never done that before, I want to do that now." I don't know if that was my turning point. Mom tells me that I also prayed with her, I think even earlier, since I was so young she didn't know if I understood. But anyway, I met God early on, and lost my heart to Him. As John says, I love because He loved me first - God is love.

 I began my first (at first humorously misguided) attempts at sharing the good news in kindergarten. At about the age of seven I gave my testimony in front of our church and was baptized. At nine, my parents began home schooling me, and we also joined our present church (Grace Community). From then on I was constantly surrounded by prayer, love, Scripture and Christian discipline, which I think sped up my growth considerably, along with the influence of my personal "quiet time" which I was encouraged to begin by my 6th grade Sunday School teacher, the Christian books I read, the prayers offered up for me, and the trials God sent me in love. As the author of Hebrews said, discipline might seem pretty tough at the time, but later on it gives you a straight view of the world and a steadiness in your soul that's worth everything!

When I was in my mid-teens, our senior pastor, Ted Groves, preached what may have been the single most influential sermon series of my life, on the book of Daniel, emphasizing Daniel's unwavering commitment to God, and closing with a challenge: that every teen listening commit themselves to follow after God with a whole heart, leaving no room for compromise, holding nothing back, like Daniel had. He then led us in a prayer of commitment. After I got home, during my quiet time, I opened my Bible at random to the beginning of Jeremiah and read how God called him out to be His alone. I felt spoken to, and wrote in the cover of my Bible:

Since I have devoted myself to God - to stand out in a land of people with no character - to love - because of that, this is my promise from God: "Today I have made you a fortified city, an iron pillar and a bronze wall to stand against the whole land - against the kings of Judah, its officials, its priests and the people of the land. They will fight against you but will not overcome you, for I am with you and will rescue you," declares the LORD. Jer. 1:18-19 (NIV)

From there on it seemed my spiritual struggles intensified. At the same time I began to be more interested in Christian work overseas. Around the beginning of 2004, I learned that one of our assistant pastors and his family intended to move to another country in a few years to do God's work, and mentioned casually to his wife that I might go with them. She responded that that would be great, and they'd be praying about it. Later that year, I mentioned to some friends of my parents that I might want to be a missionary pilot, and they responded with enthusiastic encouragement and gave me a book about missions. Also, my dad became involved with short-term work overseas, and I began to realize how real God's family was all over the world (despite what we may think, America's not the only place on earth!).

Then, while praying to be shown what I was to do after graduation, I felt very strongly an inaudible answer coming back: "Missions." And the feeling, far from fading, stayed with me, along with a settled sort of peace. I also realized that the work I was doing as an assistant in a Christian children's program was a very good fit for me. And for some time I had been concerned about and involved with the church in southeast Asia.

In the last month of that year, I received a newsletter that laid out the plan our pastor and his family had been making - since they still wanted to go overseas, and to have me go with them. Lord willing, they planned to move to Cambodia in southeast Asia, spread the good news, work with children and disciple the church. Everything fell into place; once again I felt spoken to. Without any of my usual caution, I called them up immediately and told them I wanted to seriously consider going with them. Once Pastor Tige had made an exploratory visit, they began getting ready to go, and after a lot of praying, thinking and talking it over, I committed to what I'd really known all along. I was going too.

I know God has plans for us, and though I don't know if they're the same as ours, I don't really care - we serve a good, good God, and there's nowhere I'd rather be than right in the middle of His will!

Smile! God's on the throne! Go shine for Him!